I only write in English when I feel broken. Hehehehe.

Somebody said that, no matter what your age, background, or education level, there are times when we all have negative thoughts or feel emotionally drained and mentally exhausted. I just passed it. I feel broke and lack confidence.

Let me tell you a story.

There was a time when, along the road in the middle of traffic jams in the capital, all I did was cry and blame myself. At that time I felt that the world was not on our side; they were conspiring. It went on all the way, and for hours.

But when I reach home, I have to switch my mood settings to look good in front of my kid. I smiled, and I read her a book. But unfortunately, the blood relationship between mom and kid can never be manipulated. Our sadness, even though it was covered up in such a way, apparently flowed profusely into the kid.

Mik has tantrums all night for no reason. Then I looked at myself, and I found someone with a tight chest and swollen eyes. From what I’ve learned, it’s inner contact. It was my fault, if I wanted her to stop crying, then I had to treat my sadness first.

So the first thing I have to do, is accept this feelings, and not deny to myself. I then immediately took leave and decided on a staycation. It was my way of breathing for a moment. And, it works.

Excessive crying has passed. And thank God, in my lowest point of that time, I have some of them that are my support system and “home”. So I started to think clearly and was able to come up with several options. So thank you; you know who you are.

Now what I feared has happened; it’s numbness, and it’s terrible. But, I believe I am a great person, and I am on my way to heal that.

So, happy working everyone. Let’s focus on our target, and may the universe be kind to us.

And to the mastermind, I hope you, “Your Majesty”, are satisfied enough. So there is no need to add any other scenarios. And one thing for sure, I have set boundaries for myself.

06/06 in the corner of Coffee Shop.